I can bet a lot of you are reading the title to this post and wondering where I’m going with this. Forgive people who’ve hurt ME? no way! Lol. That’s basically the attitude that most of us have. Forgiveness is the one thing that through out my life has been a real struggle for me. When someone has hurt me in the past they would be lucky if I ever even looked in their direction again..and if I did look in their direction it was probably to give them a dirty look LOL. However, as I get older and as I strengthen my faith and my walk with God I’ve really had some revelations about forgiveness that have changed my perception and ultimately made life much easier for me. So let’s get into what those revelations were!
Forgiveness is not for them, it’s for you.
Something that we need to start understanding is that when we forgive someone it’s not about them, or because they deserve it..It’s about us. When you forgive someone you are essentially taking back the power from the situation and from that person. When you hold resentment and bitterness for that person they continue to have the ball in their court. You are holding on to all those negative emotions they made you feel and in turn they gain power and you lose it. Take back your power, forgive them! Forgive with the goal to obtain peace of mind. Even if they don’t change from this situation and they continue to hurt others, you are still able to move on and not look back with that peace and closure that forgiving them will give you. In my opinion, Forgiveness is the single practice that keeps our hearts soft when the world is cold. Forgiveness is NOT a trait of the weak, in fact it takes an incredibly strong person to be able to forgive others. Don’t let someone live in your mind rent free. Let it go, forgive. Move forward and wash your hands clean of the situation.
Forgiving them doesn’t mean you have to stay in their life.
Just because you forgive someone does not mean that you need to forget what they did OR be in their lives. It is absolutely okay and sometimes necessary to completely cut people off if they’ve hurt you to a certain extent. The last thing you want to do is continue to entertain a relationship with someone who is clearly toxic. The great thing about forgiveness, is you can forgive and never look back. “I don’t hate you or wish bad on you, but we are not meant to be in each others lives” type of thing. Forgiveness is more so just the closure to the situation that is ready to end. As long as you can LET GO of the actual bitter feelings you have and move forward then that’s all that matters. Detach from the situation, and move with love. When you can think about that person and have thoughts of “I wish them well” then you’ve really elevated to a new level of growth and maturity.
If you’re Christian, hear me when I say God forgives you. EVERY DAY.
Okay, this one is a humbling one that some of yall won’t want to hear lol..Like I mentioned at the beginning of this post, the single force that gets me thinking about where I stand with the topic of forgiveness is none other than Jesus Christ. Who are we as Christians if we can not forgive others when Christ forgives us every single day for all the terrible things we say and do? For those of you who aren’t religious, you may just skip this part..and that’s cool. However, those of you who call yourselves Christians, well Y’all kind of have a moral obligation to hear me out on this one lol. When I started to think about the end of my life and all the things I’ll have to answer for..I started to think about my issue with not being able to forgive people. That is when I feel like God spoke to me and essentially said, How can you expect forgiveness from the Father if you cannot forgive Bria? And I never had an answer for that. Jesus tells us to forgive so we can be free. Don’t you want to be free? Don’t you want Gods mercy and forgiveness? I know I do, and so that is another reason why for me practicing forgiveness is going to be something I work on for the rest of my days. Remember, when you forgive you are glorifying his name, he sees this! If you feel like maybe you aren’t strong enough and you need help, PRAY ABOUT IT! Ask God to remove the bitterness and negativity that’s pent up in your heart. I have done this and trust me when I tell you he (God) ALWAYS delivers on his promise. You’re on the right path..even though it’s a path that requires a lot of strength and putting pride to the side. In the end, it’s worth it.
I hope I was able to get this message to someone who needed to hear it! Thank you for reading, and if you like my content then go ahead and subscribe with your email so you can be notified when I put up a new post.